Archive for May, 2011

It’s Early
May 31, 2011

The 'do not cross line' in Palm Springs

Walls of glass shield the roar of snore.

Black clouds battle white.

They attack the ‘do not cross line’ of the mountain top.

A dragon’s head is severed.

It’s flame turns to wisps of dissipating ethers.

And, a rainbow forms, from the dragon scales, dropping from the sky.

Breezes play the tree tops, like Frank Lloyd Weber in my mind, from the evening before.

 A bee toils.  Birds sound. There’s a  soft whistle.

Man sleeps. The world is peaceful.

Sunbeams  lighten shadows, turning them to texture.

Then, the sound of a chainsaw.

Nature screams.

Man is awake.

It’s mourning time.

Moments
May 31, 2011

Moments are capsules of time trapped as a memory.

And, our lives, are a series of memories, joined in another single moment. As we remember these moments, they are familiar because they were shared. They could have been a first kiss, a first event with special meaning, a first glimpse of something new.

If we breathe life into each and every moment we live, every day, we would have heaven.

What is heaven?

Memories.

Depression
May 27, 2011

Without love, would be a good definition of depression. Primarily, through ‘self’. An un-ending feeling of ‘famine in the soul’.

She sits with heavy make-up from a style in 1950. Costume jewelry and red lips like Betty Boop. Patiently she waits. He limps in with a cane and sits down at her booth. Little recognition is given to the time she spent to look beautiful. He sits glancing into nowhere, while she pines for affection, a look, or just an acknowledgement. She’s accompanied, but alone. He’s alone, but accompanied.

They sit next to me. They are both in their late eighties. They order a drink each and a small pizza to share. Slowly they take in the moment cherishing each other. They come here twice a week, the bartender tells me. They’ve been together over forty-five years. They are patient with each other and together, they help one another with little tasks. When they leave, all be it slowly, they shuffle with hunched backs, and are joined, as one more loving moment. Each longing for evermore.

This is the last weekend for this bar and restaurant. It is closing for the summer says one bartender. The other says it closing for good. Either way I will miss it. It makes me sad. They’ve done everything right, but there is not enough business to keep it open. The staff are worried about their commitments. They will have no jobs. The air is heavy, but they give their best service in the final hours.

Our friend has parted from his would be partner. No time and too many obstacles is the reason. There’s anger and loss and regret all rolled into one. But mostly the continual fear of feeling loneliness.

The next watering hole is full, but empty of joy. Unfulfilled searching and longing is the mood. We join them, but only to change the mood.

‘Self’ needs acknowledgement to rise from depression. Not a pill. It needs caring love, a listener, a giver and a compliment.

Repeated as many times as required to lift the darkness.

What is Power?
May 27, 2011

Power is a strange commodity. It is a derivative of energy, and energy can be used in many ways. Probably, as many ways as power is used. Because power is an energy force it is unaware of its own effect. It must be directed from an outside force. This could be nature or man. And, as with everything it can be used for useful purposes or destructive purposes.

We hold the key to how power affects our lives. On a subtle level it is through ‘feelings’. It is our first connection with this energy or force. Awareness is an important factor here. You will feel the first effects of any power force over you or through you even before a thought can take hold in your mind process.

At this point you must decide if the feeling you are experiencing is from an outside influence or an inner experience. Outside influences will feel like control over you. An inside influence will feel expansive and be non-limiting. To attach your being to this expansive feeling will set you free. That reality already exists. You only have to see it as existing and move into it.

Your whole world will change and so will your energy.

Knowing vs. Knowing
May 21, 2011

Over the last three weeks I’ve sent numerous free lunches out to existing clients as samples of our new menu. The only thing I asked in return, was feedback.

What an interesting scenario of replies I received. All were based upon what the clients perceived through their knowledge of food. Experience in a given vocation makes us knowledgeable. To a point. It’s through our five senses that we learn things in life. This gives us a ‘knowing’. However, if we’re expounding on what we think we know about a subject, without a clear understanding of essential information, are we really coming from truth? Or, is it part wishful thinking, or, a regurgitation of what we believe is true? What is important here , is that many times we speak without knowing what we are talking about. We use judgements to define our ‘knowing’.

This blog could be a prime example.

There is another type of ‘knowing’. It is based on a an intuitive introspection that is connected with The Source. It is not based on cognitive thought. This ‘knowing’ is based on a ‘feeling’. Paradoxically, this ‘knowing feeling’ is usually accompanied by an ‘unknowingness’, but only in the sense of where it will lead to. A ‘your future is not predestined’, feeling. Your choices are still open and undetermined. When you make a decision to ‘trust’ your ‘feeling’ and follow through with its direction, at that point, you come into ‘flow’. You are not fighting life, you are a part of life.

This type of ‘knowing’ based on feelings is anchored in truth. You will know it by the fact that there is no judgement or criticism associated with its feeling. It really can’t be explained as well as it is felt. It will permeate your body and if you turn away from its guidance, you loose your connection with The Source and re-connect with your ego.

And we all know how the ego judges things.

Separation
May 20, 2011

 

Commenting to ourselves lessens our burdens. Who knows ourselves better than that person inside, we talk with each day. We are two separate people. This one, who communicates to…….. ‘that one’.

As consoling as these conversations may seem to us, they will not make us feel better. This continual separation we experience has to morph into a ‘oneness’, if we are to be free.

From ‘light’ will come complete compassion, without judgement. Born on infinite understanding and spacial love.

Duality will disintegrate.

Color Your World – Update 8
May 16, 2011

 

Instant. That’s how we expect everything to happen. We’ve been spoiled.

When I started this program two months ago, I assumed it wouldn’t take too long. But I was using time as a basis for my reasoning. Try and take ‘time’ out of your equation while on any self-improvement gig. I’ve viewed a set of photos of ‘before and after’. I see some improvement. Photos of yourself in the beginning, and then again at intervals along the way really help you to focus on areas that still need improvement. But there is a way to go.

How far is ‘a way’?

I have an image in my mind that is driving me further. At 62 I want to be in the best shape and health of my life. Why now? It’s because I didn’t do it sooner. As you age, life takes on different meanings, hopes, wishes, desires. It’s nice that we still have these traits. We’re not out to conquer the world as much as we are out to conquer those things we feel we didn’t accomplish. However, I do see youth doing things now a days that I hadn’t even considered twenty or thirty years ago. The societal atmosphere keeps changing, and as it changes, so do our selection of choices from which to draw down from.

Some things that I’ve noticed:

Re-igniting my desire for meditation has brought some new awareness and also some old memories. When I was meditating the other night, I could feel my energy building around me. It began to ‘wobble’. To the point that I thought I was going to fall over in my chair, even, while being seated. I haven’t felt that feeling in thirty years. I’m glad that I am exercising. If you begin to meditate, you have to make sure your body can handle the extra energy you develop. Interestingly enough, in many subtle ways, life is improving on itself. The more self-awareness you develop, the less unpleasant experiences enter into your life. A pleasant paradox. Going deeper into who you are is the change you really want. The resonance you project is the music people hear subconsciously. The sound should match the universe.

We have a long, long way to go.

Dilemma
May 14, 2011

endless-opposites-dawid-michalczyk

This is about restriction vs. freedom.

Lets say we have a ‘list’. This list could be any number of numerous unfulfilled accomplishments. It can be an outside condition that has been imposed upon us, or even a self-imposed condition that makes you feel imprisoned. But, it is a list, and it usually means we have commitments towards some sort of duty. It could be anything from a ‘don’t do this list’, to ‘a shopping list’, to ‘a things to do list’, to  ‘a desire list’.

If it is a committment imposed upon us, we feel restriction. Intuitively, we want the restriction removed. If it isn’t removed, we generally fight it in some way, shape or form.

This restriction, is just another form of mind resistance.

Let’s say we want freedom from the restriction, and the restriction is suddenly lifted from us. Or, we fight and remove the restriction.

In the quest for freedom, we relinquish restriction and take upon ourselves….. responsibility. We set out to personally accomplish what ever is necessary to keep this new-found freedom.

In the beginning, we get an euphoric feeling, when we assume the responsibility. It is because, we feel it has given us a reprieve and a freedom we have lacked up until this point. The taste of this freedom is like an intoxicating drug. It lifts us to a natural high we haven’t experienced before.

We are free from the restriction. We savor our new freedom. What was imposed upon us before, is something we now control. We like this responsibility. It gives us a feeling of power, strength and command.

But, after a while, the responsibility loses its charm.

Like the list we had in the beginning, it becomes a chore, and burdens us. To the point that we want the burden of responsibility lifted.

What to do?

Do the list.

Freedom is only a state of mind.

Expectation
May 10, 2011

I expected the Jacaranda trees to bloom a month ago, but they’re only blooming now.

I expected a ‘thank you’ after I held the door for someone, and a ‘thank you’ for a complimentary lunch, but people are raised differently.

I expected mail when I went to the post office, but the box was empty.

I expected a reply to an email I sent, but I received no reply.

I expected opinions, but not the ones I obtained.

I expected kindness, but was ignored.

I expected not to feel hurt, but I acquired pain.

I expected more, but received less.

I expected less anger, more love.

I expect people to care.

I expect……….. I’ll get over this.

Simple
May 9, 2011

Simple, is what simple is.

Most of us would be content to live our lives without complications. But there are our controllers in place that dish out societies wants and wishes. Opinions surface from everyone and our minds conjure images from our imagination to confuse us.

We live to survive and survive by working. We work as two, but are only one. The veil that covers our mind is complicated. Yet, can be removed simply.

Deconstruct its complication. Remove mind resistance.  Simply said, focus on ‘no-mind’.

Simple, usually conveys ‘single’ as in single purpose.

Feel.

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